On the Feminization of Cursewords

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Cv2INuu9eo

The above clip was blatantly stolen from Librarian in Black who got it from the Lipstick Librarian. It's a beautiful chain of social networking.

Today I want to talk to y'all about something near and dear to my heart: cursing.

I'm a proliferate curser. I have been as far back as I can remember and I do not apologize for it. Sometimes only a good fuck or shit will do or maybe, something more creative.

Then there are balls. As in "I wish I had the balls". I'm not a femnazi or anything, but it has finally occurred to me that that's bullshit. I know plenty of women that are 'ballsier' then men, but do not have said appendage. Why do men get all the credit and when a women is being assertive it is because she is being manly?

I cry foul. I have been known occasionally to say "She's got great ovaries for doing that." But let's face it, it doesn't quite roll off the tongue the same way. I could be an uberdork and use something gender neutral like 'She's got such great spunk', but that makes me sound a hundred and fifty years old. I'm not really a spunk person unless it's referring to the male bodily fluid.

So what's the answer? No, seriously. I want you tell me. What can I use to express someone's awesome arrogance or chutzpah? And yes, I know chutzpah works, but the Yiddish, she has to stop somewhere before she eats my brain.

I'm looking at y'all. What's our other option?

Cupping my balls in anticipation,
Your fucking CGL